I'll Paint What They're Painting.

Have you ever seen the movie When Harry Met Sally staring Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan? If not you may at least know the classic scene where Sally demonstrates to Harry how she can fake an orgasm right there in the diner they've chosen to eat a meal. The scene ends with the classic line from an onlooking lady, "I'll have what she's having". Keep that in mind for a moment.

I'm subscribed to the newsletter of respected Art Advice writer, Sylvia White, who recently published an article called the 12 Step Recovery Program for Artists.

What struck me about the article was the very first step reproduced below:

1. Admit that you are powerless over your ARTmaking, and it is the only thing that makes your life manageable.

Many artists describe the feelings they get from making art as an almost spiritual or sexual experience, feeling a complete and total sense of happiness and being at one with the world. Much like the feeling an athlete gets from hitting the ball in the sweet spot. But, instead of it being a fleeting moment, it is a lasting sense satisfaction and contentment. It is what keeps them the sane, wonderful people we love.

Did you spot the line in there; Many artists describe the feelings they get from making art as an almost spiritual or sexual experience, feeling a complete and total sense of happiness and being at one with the world.

I would describe creating my art as many things but none of them would come close to it being a 'sexual experience'.

If you are one of those artists who do then let me know what you're painting because, dammit, I want to give it a try!!

Home Made Crutch, MacGyver Style

My partner, Enigma, recently had a bad fall and did her ankle in. Nothing broken thankfully but painful enough to make walking nearly impossible.

Initially Enigma was using an old student office chair (with coaster wheels) to get around on which was proving to be awkward, impractical and still quite painful on her ankle. Me, being the creative person that I am, went out to the shed, MacGyver style, to see what we had to make some kind of crutch.

After some searching I brought together our mop handle, the handle off the end of a spade, a rubber stopper, a towel and some tape (couldn't find a use for a paperclip) to fashion the very effective temporary crutch you can see in the photo.

Whilst, ultimately, it didn't get a lot of use after about day two of Enigma's ordeal it did come in handy for a trip down to the chemist to fill a script for pain killers. The Women at the chemist was very impressed with my makeshift crutch too.

Enigma said on the day she twisted her ankle she had planned to vacuum and mop the floors the following day. I should have left the mop head on the end of the handle!

NavMan: Telling YOU Where To Go!

Traveling to Port Broughton and Moonta with the aid of a NavMan was something of a new experience for me. My partner, Enigma, was doing the driving so I had plenty of time to observe this little technological marvel from the passenger seat.

If you're like me, able to get yourself from A to B (most of the time) using old fashioned maps and street directories, then you might appreciate the following explanation; A NavMan or, I presume, Navigational Manager, is a little electronic device with an LCD display that attaches to the windscreen (usually) of your car and tells you how to get where you're going through the use of real time animated maps, voice instructions and GPS (global positioning system) data. (See my photo above).

Before this invention the term Navigational Manager and Passenger were interchangeable as many of us drivers relied on our memory and the map reading skills (or lack there of) of our passengers to direct us to where we were going.

A NavMan completely eliminates the need to even read a map. Simply enter the data of where your trip starts and where you want to go and let your NavMan direct you, as you're driving, with a smug, yet still, somehow, emotionless voice of a person who knows better than you. It'll tell you where to go.

I learnt that you shouldn't argue with a NavMan and that NavMans should have an I told you so mode because, if anyone is going to make a mistake in getting there, it'll be you. The Human Error in the system.

For example, on our way to the Cornish Festival in the town of Moonta, we passed through the town of Kadina. For some strange reason NavMan directed us through the town on one side of the town centre, on some big back street loop, that took several minutes, and got us to a point at the other end of the town centre that both Enigma and I could clearly see we could have got to in seconds simply by driving through the town centre its self. Both of us thought the NavMan was just being stupid.

On the way home we passed back through Kadina and this time the NavMan directed us straight through the town centre where we discovered the main street was two lanes of one way traffic only. It was at this point I concluded the NavMan needed an I told you so mode.

Don't argue with the NavMan - it knows what it's doing. Even if you think it doesn't it'll still, politely, tell you where to go!